Tag Archive | pain

The Heart of the Rose

A Rose With a Purpose–Packed and Ready to Go!

It was special from the start . . . Special, in that it was a gift of love from my church family on Mother’s Day . . . Special, because it not only survived the steam from my coffee cup but miraculously began to grow without any root or soil . . . Special, because after its story, the Lord revealed more . . . This special rose has more to tell you . . .

Miracles Always Have Purpose!

My table seems quite empty now without the rose, but I can drink a cup of coffee again without being cautious where to set it. I miss my rose, but it wasn’t mine to keep. I have learned that when I receive something, be it money, food, gift etc, to look inside and inquire of the Lord–is it for me or did He have someone else in mind to be blessed, and I the carrier? Especially with money. Is it for me or is it a seed? –That said, it didn’t occur to me that I would be giving away a Mother’s Day gift, because, why would one do that?

Why?

Because, the Lord has need of it!

After my previous post, “A Gift of New Life,” someone made the comment to me stating–“That post touched me more than any of all of your posts.” What exactly was it about that one? He couldn’t really say, but the Lord had used that post to place His finger directly on the pain of his soul. It was just time–time to deal with the wounds of life that had been stuffed but never healed. It was time for God to answer my prayers; I had been praying for him for a very long time.

My time came when my husband died. Suddenly, years of stuffed pain erupted in me like a volcano. It was the proverbial ‘last straw’ and I didn’t know how to cope with it. My friend Paula, now gone home to be with the Lord, took the time, patience, and love required to unravel my mess–helping me to live again! I thank God for her, I am so grateful–everyone needs a special friend like Paula!

Be encouraged, the Lord hears you!

This man stated that he had been planning to call me for about a month. “I want what you’ve got!” he emphatically stated. What? “That baptism of the Holy Spirit–I want that!”

That is one of the greatest gifts one could ever desire!

“For John baptized with water, but before many days you shall be baptized with the Holy Spirit.” Acts 1:5

If you’re having trouble connecting with God. If your walk with Him seems inactive and dull. It’s likely that this is what you are missing. Don’t let people tell you that it’s not of God. Open your Bible and read it for yourself.

So, it was the next morning when I looked at the rose and realized, this is why it was growing but not putting out roots. This rose represented the man’s new beginning. During our conversation, so much pain of his past poured forth–revealing his need for the Lord to heal and deliver. Pain from his past, the trauma of Vietnam, loss, and the alcohol he used to anesthetize it all had gripped his life–caging his heart and soul. He had tried everything to break free, but there are some things we just can’t do on our own.

A few days before I was given the rose, a video about rooting a rose from a cutting had come into my YouTube feed. It was interesting, so I sent it to my text for–someday. Now I realized, God, had sent it, and ‘someday’ was here!

The left picture, presented above, is the rose 18 days after I received it. Who knows how long it had been cut before that. After it was given to me, it was three or four hours out of water; not even a wet paper towel on the end. So, I prayed when I packed it up, that it would survive the journey; but it was so straight and strong it didn’t even ruffle a petal. I took it to the man and said, “This represents your new beginning. You are going to plant this and it will be a marker of your new life. It didn’t put down roots because you are the one that’s going to be putting down new roots!” We talked a bit, read through scriptures, and then it was time to pray. He had told me the night before that he had asked and asked but nothing ever seemed to happen. Well, God made sure he knew something happened, because he radically received his baptism!

He first commented that he could smell the rose. “No, that rose doesn’t have a scent,” I told him. “I’m smelling roses!” he reaffirmed. It was Jesus. His Presence sometimes has a scent. When I worked at a factory years ago, I was in a corner all by myself and got so caught up in my thoughts of Him I began to worship in my heart; and suddenly was enveloped with the smell of roses. Factories don’t smell like roses, and there was no one else near me. Other times I have smelled lily of the valley and once, honey and roses. He then commented that it was getting stronger, but I couldn’t smell anything–this was just for him!

I put my hands on his head to pray and it became hot and sweat broke out on his head when I asked the Lord to baptize him in the Holy Spirit. I commanded a spirit of addiction off of him, and then the Holy Spirit filled him and he began to shake. He sat shaking for some time, “Stay with it,” I instructed him. The Lord was doing a work in him. During this time, I had prayed that the Lord heal him from the top of his head to the souls of his feet; and the very first thing he did when he got up was to go smell the rose. “It doesn’t smell like anything.” he said to me. “Yep, told you, it has no scent–that was Jesus!” Much later we went to a restaurant for dinner–our plan was to go to lunch but this had become a much bigger event than either of us had expected. At dinner, before he even sat down, he said, “Do you smell that?” Yeah, sure, the food smells were really strong, garlic and sort of a pungent BBQ. He got that misty look on his face as it dawned on him, the Lord had healed him–he has not been able to smell anything for years! –and that is his beginning . . .

Glory to God!

“‘For John baptized with water, but before many days you shall be baptized with the Holy Spirit.'”

“‘But you shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria and to the end of the earth.'” Acts 1:8

“And suddenly a sound came from heaven like the rush of a mighty wind, and it filled all the house where they were sitting. And there appeared to them tongues as of fire, distributed and resting on each one of them. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance.” Acts 22-4

“And Peter said to them, ‘Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. For the promise is to you and to your children and to all that are far off, every one whom the Lord our God calls to him.'” Acts 2:38-39

“As I began to speak, the Holy Spirit fell on them just as on us at the beginning. And I remembered the word of the Lord, how he said. ‘John baptized with water, but you shall be baptized with the Holy Spirit.’ Acts 11:15-16

“And he said to them, ‘Did you receive the Holy Spirit when you believed?’ And they said, ‘No, we have never even heard that there is a Holy Spirit.’ And he said, ‘Into what then were you baptized?’ They said, ‘Into John’s baptism.’ And Paul said, ‘John baptized with the baptism of repentance, telling the people to believe in the one who was to come after him, that is, Jesus. On hearing this, they were baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus. And when Paul had laid his hands upon them, the Holy Spirit came on them; and they spoke with tongues and prophesied.” Acts 19:2-6

“I indeed baptize you with water unto repentance: but he that cometh after me is mightier than I, whose shoes I am not worthy to bear, he shall baptize you with the Holy Ghost, and with fire.” Matthew 3:11 KJV

“‘ And I tell you, ask, and it will be given you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. What father among you, if his son asks for a fish, will instead of a fish give him a serpent; or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!'” Luke 11:10-13

“‘–If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.'” John 8:31-32

Following the Nudge

I have come to learn that a nudge from the Lord is one of the most exciting things we can receive from Him and I can’t hardly wait for the next one. . .

Something’s changed . . . A ‘suddenly’ that happened when I labored to break out of the ‘ME’ realm and look about. What a trap it is to try to repair our own baggage, instead of handing it over to Him.

Am I there yet?

Oh, heck no.

At one point, He deemed me healthy enough to call me higher. Willing to comply, it didn’t occur to me that ‘higher’ means I get to see the raw truth of just how desperately I needed to change my ways! In other words, higher took me lower than I’ve ever been to see, so very clearly, it can’t be anything but Him!

What a hard year it’s been and what a mess! Sometimes it feels like drowning but out of the ashes comes God! I know it’s usually quoted ‘gold’, but GOD is what happens when we come to our end–He is there!

“If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there. If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea; Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.” Psalms 139:8-10 KJV

Handing the reins to Him,  determining not to thrash anymore, no more trying to figure it out, I waited. . .

Suddenly, a nudge, a still small Voice, a simple direction–“Go talk to her”.

If I hadn’t obeyed, the conversation wouldn’t have happened, and I wouldn’t have learned that she harbored a hidden pain. “This is God”, she said. “My dad is in prison.” Armored with the knowledge that God had sent her help, and the full set of books to read His healing messages, hope dawned.

Another prisoner sent a letter. His intent, he said at the end of the three page letter, was to ask for books. “I don’t know why I told you all that.” he writes. I do, Jesus wants him free! For 21 years he’s believed a lie, the judge planted in his heart, that he sent his girlfriend to hell. Every single day he has been tormented by this. I wrote him back, writing God’s healing Word, and speaking of His Love toward him. My letter was three pages too! God had a lot to say to this poor brokenhearted man.

Recently, a young woman harboring a deep wound from her past, far too big to bear, stated she couldn’t look people in the eyes. The Lord nudged me to say something to her that put His finger on that pain. Immediately, the Holy Spirit came upon me with sudden crying and I could feel the Father weeping over her. He spoke words to her that comforted; assuring love, safety, and hope. Words, she said, that she has never heard from those that should have protected her, but didn’t.

In all of these incidents, I was merely the conduit for the Holy Spirit to pass through; ministering His love, healing and freedom to those He loves that were hiding secret pain. Their ‘suddenly’ has come and I’m confident that as their freedom, begun by God, continues, He will see it through to completion. The stronghold is broken. Healing will come!

Readers, I  know now more than ever that the enemy keeps us toiling over our own problems, seemingly mountains,  to keep us from carrying out the work of the Lord. He came to set the captives free. They’re not all in prisons you know! They’re all around you, and it may even be you; but as you set about to be obedient to God, allowing His words to flow through you to others, you will be freed yourself and you won’t even have realized it. Your ‘suddenly’ will come as well. Why?

Because, you’ve been about your Father’s business!

Just say yes to the nudge. . . He will do all the rest.

“The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, and he has anointed me to be hope for the poor, freedom for the brokenhearted, and new eyes for the blind, and to preach to prisoners, “You are set free!’ I have come to share the message of Jubilee, for the time of God’s great acceptance has begun.” Luke 4:18-19 TPT

What is Happiness?

Happiness is not an expression of your surroundings, but a condition of your heart. If your heart is not sound, neither will you be found to be happy.

A kind and gentle heart can be just as unhappy if trust is broken–pain attacks; the heart of a gentle soul retreats, often feels defeat and may never trust again.

The hardened heart brazenly moves forward, brashly confident; a disguise of fear–years of pain have taught it to remain, aloof. Both seemingly opposite hearts are the same–wounded.

I speak gently concerning this subject, for I know how deeply you have been hurt. When trust is broken, it is not easy to repair. Man cannot heal a broken heart, but I can and I AM here. I am near to the brokenhearted and I see your pain–you need not tell Me–I SEE.

“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves the crushed in spirit.” Psalms 34:18

I need you to trust Me.

We are going to begin anew, to review what isn’t right. I AM asking you to give up the fight–and REST.

You see it isn’t a fight, if you’ll fall into My arms, for I’ve got your back–I’ll keep you from harm. Together we’ll carve a new path–walking hand in hand and you’ll see that, as I put My trust in you, you’ll begin to trust me too. And soon, very soon, you’ll find that all is well. Your broken heart will begin to mend, as pain and confusion come to an end.

“Thy word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” Psalm 119:105

Soon you will see that, trust placed in Me, is the only way to be free.

So I tell you that ‘happiness’ is a thin veil if under the surface your heart is not well–all will come crashing down. We must get to the core–into your heart I will pour My love and remove the veil. The joy that springs forth of the happiness now is, truly a heart made well.

Fall into My arms.

Let us begin

“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me. Cast me not away from thy presence, and take not they Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of thy salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.” Psalms 51:10-12

“Blessed is every one who fears the Lord, who walks in his ways! You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands; you shall be happy, and it shall be well with you.” Psalms 128:1-2

“The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand. The sun shall not smite you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all evil; he will keep your life. The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in from this time forth for evermore.” Psalms 121:5-8

“O taste and see that the Lord is good! Happy is the man who takes refuge in him!” Psalms 34:8

 

Free of Nasty

Nice or Nasty? Both are behaviors of the heart; both seem common from the start. But things do not seem as though they do appear, for one behavior truly has its root planted in fear.

“In a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver but also of wood and earthenware, and some for noble use, some for ignoble. If any one purifies himself from what is ignoble, then he will be a vessel for noble use, consecrated and useful to the master of the house, ready for any good work.” II Timothy 2:20-21

Fear can be complex, a given opportunity, for the one who has lost trust, to turn and heap fear upon thee. Nasty is a behavior of the heart of one that carries wounds–hurts that run far and deep–troublesome  even in their sleep; producing fruit that is nasty.

Do you know of one like this?

They toil and connive, their goal only to strive, against the one they see at peace–one who is nice and not nasty.

  • My Love will heal their wounded heart.
  • My Love will give them a brand new start.
  • My Love will cause the soul to thrive, of the one who seems only to survive.

You who are nice, you ought to think twice, about the one from whom you would rather run. For I call them dear, and ask you to lead them near. I wish to set them free from nasty.

Do you see?

Lord, could it be, that this one is me? But for your Love, there go I. I was the one with a wounded heart, yet your Love sustained.

  • I lost trust, yet your Love remained.
  • I acted out, when others found peace.
  • I, the one seeking release from nasty.

Oh Lord I see–that one is me!

Please Father, hear my plea, to complete your Love in me. For there is an area not yet free, from nasty. The room closed off–too painful to see. Boarded and still–please take it from me. I’ve held on too long–its grown much too strong. A place I can no longer trace–its root remains in me.

“Strive for peace with all men, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one fail to obtain the grace of God; that no “root of bitterness” spring up and cause trouble, and by it the many become defiled–” Hebrews 12:14-15

Please hear my plea!!

My child, I have never left you, yet I needed for you to see, your whole heart you did not yield or give to Me–you’ve been holding back on Me. I can restore–will heal you completely, but it must begin with you. For I do not force myself inside–invite Me in to sup with thee. I will abide and you will thrive, as My Love reveals the pain, but only to wash away the stain, of the one who had lost their way.

“–No one tears a piece from a new garment and puts it upon an old garment; if he does, he will tear the new, and the piece from the new will not match the old. And no one puts new wine into old wineskins; if he does, the new wine will burst the skins and it will be spilled, and the skins will be destroyed. But new wine must be put into fresh wineskins.” Luke 5:36-38

I Love you!

You will be brand new, when the work is through, but there yet remains one thing…

I can not yet begin, or ever change, the one who remains the same. To begin, you must admit and then submit to the One who Loves you so. Let go of blame and so refrain from holding back–you know. I will complete the work in thee, with permission from you, that I might see…

All that you’ve held back–

Forever Free

If you would simply trust in Me!

“Fear not, for you will not be ashamed; be not confounded, for you will not be put to shame; for you will forget the shame of your youth, and the reproach of your widowhood you will remember no more. For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is his name; and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer, the God of the whole earth he is called.” Isaiah 54:4-5

“–for God is at work in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.” Philippians 2:13

“Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect; but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brethren, I do not consider that I have made it my own; but one thing I do, forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Let those of us who are mature be thus minded; and if in anything you are otherwise minded, God will reveal that also to you. Only let us hold true to what we have attained.” Philippians 3:12-16

 

 

Find Me There

To deny Me, is to deny the very essence of your being. You may have not denied Me for Salvation. You may have asked Me into your heart to dwell with you, be a friend to you. But when you hold back as ‘untouchable’ those areas of your heart you choose not to reveal or let go of, you deny not only Me, but yourself. You rob yourself the opportunity to be healed-to be touched by the one who loves you most; who esteems you highly as a prize–a treasured gift!

My love, I know it is painful to look within. You have hardened yourself–formed callous to not be reminded of the wounds within. But I AM gentle and kind and with you in mind, I will take that pain.

Forever

I have the ability and capability for that which would take endless council. But, when you open to Me, I know.

We don’t need to dig and divide for I know.

What seems monumental, is made very simple, when you bring it to the one who knows–the one who loves you the most. You will find Me there–right next to that care.

Trust

and Find Me There.

I lift up my eyes to the hills. From whence does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.” Psalms 121:1-2

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-29

“Cast all your anxieties on him, for he cares about you.” I Peter 5:7

“–Have faith in God, Truly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and cast into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you receive it, and you will.” Mark 11:22-24

“I will bless the Lord at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth. My soul makes its boast in the Lord; let the afflicted hear and be glad. O magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name together! I sought the Lord, and he answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. Look to him, and be radiant; so your faces shall never be ashamed. This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him, and saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them. O taste and see that the Lord is good! Happy is the man who takes refuge in him!” Psalms 34:1-8

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is thy faithfulness. ‘The Lord is my portion,’ says my soul, ‘therefore I will hope in him.'” Lamentations 3:22-24

“–I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a child quieted at its mother’s breast; like a child that is quieted is my soul.” Psalms 131:2

“Be strong and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the Lord!” Psalms 31:24